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How to know if you're in a healthy relationship

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Offline Ruvarangu6

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How to know if you're in a healthy relationship
« on: April 17, 2015, 10:00:49 AM »
Relationships are a necessary part of our
existence. However, relationships can be healthy
or unhealthy. Healthy relationships contribute to
our overall well-being while an unhealthy
relationship does the exact opposite. There are
different things that point to whether a
relationship is healthy or not. To tell if your
relationship is healthy or not ask yourself these
1. What does he/she bring out of me?
The quality of your relationship revolves around
what you become by it. How is the relationship
impacting you? Note this is not about the other
person forcing you to change who you already
are. In a healthy relationship, you don’t feel
forced to change who you are but rather inspired
to make needed changes. In other words, it does
not try to fix you but rather help you fix yourself.
A true partner knows your weakness but shows
you your strengths. Feels your fears, but fortifies
your faith. Sees your anxieties, but frees your
spirit. Recognizes your disability, but emphasizes
your possibilities.
2. What does he/ she think of me?
What your partner thinks of you really matters. It
tells or determines the value he or she places in
such a relationship. And we usually give quality
attention and care to whatever we value. Does
he/she see you as a plus in his/her life?
Relationship works when it involves mutual
contribution. If your partner does not see you as
a value or at least a potential value in his life, the
intimacy and closeness will likely diminish with
Also, people tend to become what the most
important person in their lives believes they can
be. That’s why people in abusive relationships
are usually self-critical and timid.
3.What does he/she think of my future?
Every true relationship invests in your future one
way or the other. Your relationship should
contribute to your dreams and aspirations. Does
your partner support and consider God’s plan for
you. Does he/she help it or hinder it?
This emphasizes the need for you to determine
the direction of your life. If you know what you
want in life and where you are going, it is easy
enough to figure out who fits into the picture.
4. How does he/she behave towards me in
difficult times?
The real test on the quality of your relationship
comes during difficult times not when the goings
are smooth. If he/she turns abusive or one way
or the other makes it look like you are the cause
of his/her problems, that’s a negative signal.
5. What does he/she thinks about my values and
If you are in a relationship where you have to
sacrifice your core values, beliefs and things that
really matter to you, you may need to re-consider
that relationship. It is true that we are to adjust
and sacrifice certain things in a relationship.
However, when it involves relegating things that
really matter to you; you are likely to end up
unhappy in such relationship. One thing peculiar
with couples in healthy relationships is the fact
that they have similar values, beliefs and focus.
6. How does he/she reacts when issues arise?
Disagreement occurs every in any relationship.
What matters is how it is handled? If he/she
holds grudges for days and drags every little
issue or disagreement to the extent that a third
party need to be involved before it can be
resolved, it does not tell well about that
7. How much do I trust him/her?
A relationship without trust breeds insecurity,
heart breaks and emotional instability. It is
impossible to have a relationship if there is no
trust in such relationship. Couples in a healthy
relationship are quite open to each other. That’s
why communication is very important in
relationships. If he/she allows you to wonder or
try to guess what he/she has in mind; If you
constantly sense insincerity from him/her, then
there’s bound to be trust issues in such
Have a lovely night rest.


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